Module 10 · Social presence · Lesson 9 of 11

Respect, and self-respect

Treating everyone as worth your courtesy, yourself included.

6 min read · Level: Beginner · Free — no account needed to read

The idea

Respect is treating everyone as worth your courtesy — the cleaner and the director, the child and the elder. How people treat those who can do nothing for them says a great deal about their character.

Self-respect is the same courtesy turned inward: not letting yourself be mistreated, keeping your own standards, speaking to yourself as you would to a friend. The two support each other.

Why it matters

Respect is the foundation people build trust on. Those who show it widely tend to receive it widely.

See it happen

At a restaurant, Sami’s friend is rude to the waiter over a small mistake.

The first reaction

Sami laughs awkwardly and says nothing, not wanting to embarrass his friend.

With the idea

He thanks the waiter warmly, and later mentions to his friend that it felt harsh. His friend is quiet, then agrees.

What changed

Quiet respect for the waiter, and an honest word to his friend, kept his own standards.

Easy to get wrong

• Showing respect only to people with status.
• Confusing self-respect with arrogance.

Try it now: Everyday respect

1. List people you interact with who often go unnoticed — guards, cleaners, drivers, assistants.
2. Write one small way to show them respect this week.

Questions to think about

• Who in your daily life deserves more of your courtesy?
• Where do you let yourself be treated with less respect than you would accept for a friend?

Your challenge this week

Learn and use the name of someone you see often but have never really spoken to.