Life Skills · 5 lessons

Knowing yourself

Understand what you want, what you value and how you work, before trying to steer the rest of your life. 5 short lessons with worked examples.

Free — no account needed to read

Understand what you want, what you value and how you work, before trying to steer the rest of your life.

The lessons

• What you want vs what you were told to want — Some of your goals are truly yours. Others were handed to you. Telling them apart saves years spent on someone else's dream.
• Your values in action — Your real values show in how you spend your time, money and attention, not only in the words you would use to describe yourself.
• Your patterns and triggers — You repeat certain reactions in certain situations. Spotting the pattern is the first step to choosing something different.
• Where you thrive — Everyone does their best in certain conditions. Knowing yours helps you choose work, study and relationships that bring out your best.
• Noticing the story you tell yourself — We all carry stories about who we are: "I am bad with money", "I am not creative". Some are true; some are just old.

Practise

Write down one story you tell about yourself and one goal you are working toward. For each, ask whether it came from you or was handed to you, and what evidence you have now.

• A considered answer tends to include: names where the story or goal came from
• A considered answer tends to include: looks at present evidence, not only old experience
• A considered answer tends to include: says what would change if it were not true

Try it this week

This week, do one small, concrete act that expresses a value you care about but have been neglecting, and note how it felt.

Reflect

When were you last most fully yourself, and what was around you at that moment?