Module 12 · Adapting to change · Lesson 5 of 6

Persist, pivot or let go

Three honest options when something isn’t working, and questions that help you pick.

8 min read · Free — no account needed to read

The idea

When something is not working, there are three honest options. Persist: keep going with the same goal and approach, because progress is slower than hoped but real. Pivot: keep the goal but change the approach, because the current route is not working. Let go: set the goal down, because it no longer fits your life or values, or the cost has grown too high.

Each is right in some situations and wrong in others. Persisting is right when the goal matters and there are signs of progress. Pivoting is right when the goal matters but the approach keeps failing. Letting go is right when the goal itself no longer fits.

The danger is choosing by feeling in a low moment. It helps to decide in advance when you will review, and what signs would point to each option — so the choice is made clearly, not in the middle of a bad week.

Why it matters

Having three options instead of two — keep going or quit — makes it much easier to respond well. Many goals that seem to need abandoning actually need a pivot.

See it happen

Laura has been trying to lose weight through running for a year. She hates running, rarely goes, and feels discouraged.

The first read

Nothing has worked, so she concludes she should give up on getting healthier altogether.

With this idea

She asks the three questions. The goal — feeling healthier — still matters. The approach — running — is clearly not working for her. She pivots to swimming with a friend twice a week, which she enjoys. Six months later she feels much better.

What changed

She pivoted the approach instead of abandoning the goal.

Easy to get wrong

• Seeing only two options: keep going or quit. The pivot is often the best choice.
• Deciding in the lowest moment. Review on a planned date, with signs agreed in advance.

Different perspectives

Reasonable people disagree here. None of these is presented as the final word.

Staying power is underrated

Some researchers argue that many people give up just before progress would have shown, and that persistence matters a great deal for long goals.

Letting go is a skill

Research on goal disengagement suggests people who can release goals that no longer work, and commit to new ones, tend to do better emotionally.

What this rests on

Practical wisdom. A widely used way of working. Useful to try — not a scientific law.

• Carsten Wrosch and colleagues — goal disengagement (2003 onwards) — People who can let go of goals that have become unattainable, and find new ones, tend to report better well-being.
• Angela Duckworth — Grit (2016) — Argues that sustained passion and perseverance for long-term goals matter for achievement. Later analyses found grit overlaps heavily with conscientiousness and predicts success less strongly than first claimed.

Try it: Persist, pivot or let go?

1. Pick something that is not working as you hoped.
2. Ask: does the goal still matter? Is there any sign of progress? Has the approach been changed?
3. Write which of the three options the answers point to, and the first step.

Reflect

• Which of the three do you tend to choose by default?
• What have you abandoned that might have needed only a pivot?

Use it in the coming days

Choose one struggling goal, answer the three questions this week, and record your decision as a note on that goal.

Where to do it: My Goals

A decision to persist, pivot or let go belongs with the goal it is about.