Module 13 · Leadership & people management · Lesson 5 of 12

Feedback and coaching

Helping people grow by asking more and telling less.

7 min read · Level: Practising · Free — no account needed to read

The idea

Leaders give feedback regularly, not only at annual reviews: specific, timely, about behaviour, and caring. Both praise and criticism work best when they are concrete.

Coaching goes further: asking questions that help people solve problems themselves. “What have you tried? What options do you see? What would you do if I weren’t here?” builds people’s own judgement rather than dependence.

Why it matters

People grow fastest with honest feedback and good questions. Leaders who coach multiply what their team can do.

See it happen

A team member keeps coming to Faruk with every small problem.

The first reaction

He answers each question quickly, since it seems the fastest way.

With the idea

He starts asking, “What do you think we should do?” first. Within weeks the team member solves most problems alone and only brings the hard ones.

What changed

Coaching questions built independence that answers never had.

Easy to get wrong

• Saving all feedback for formal reviews.
• Asking coaching questions when someone urgently needs a direct answer.

Different perspectives

Reasonable people disagree here. None of these is presented as the answer.

Care and candour together

Kim Scott’s idea of caring personally while challenging directly captures what many people remember as the best feedback they received.

Candour can be misused

Critics warn the idea is often used to excuse bluntness, and that directness norms vary between cultures and people.

Where this comes from: Kim Scott — Radical Candor (2017).

Try it now: Three coaching questions

1. Write three questions you could ask instead of giving an answer.
2. Think of someone who often asks you for help.
3. Plan which question to try next time.

Questions to think about

• Who coached you rather than told you, and what did you learn?
• Where do you give answers when a question would help more?

Your challenge this week

Answer one request for help this week with a coaching question first.