Module 8 · Goals & direction · Lesson 1 of 8

Goals vs wishes

A wish is something you would like. A goal has a reason, a first step and a time you will check in on it.

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The idea

Many of the things we call goals are really wishes: get fit, learn a language, start a business, be less stressed. Wishes are valuable because they show what we care about. But they rarely change anything on their own, because they do not tell us what to do on Tuesday.

A wish becomes a goal when you add a few things: why it matters to you, in your own words; what it would look like to have it, clearly enough to recognise; a first concrete step; and a time when you will look at how it is going.

Why do goals fail? Common reasons are that they were never more than wishes, that there are too many at once, that the reason was borrowed from someone else, that the first step was too big, or that nobody ever checked in on them. Most of these can be fixed before you start.

Why it matters

Research on goal setting suggests that clear, specific goals usually lead to more effort and better results than vague intentions, and that deciding when and where you will act makes follow-through much more likely. Turning a wish into a goal is how intention starts to shape a week.

See it happen

Every New Year, Pavel writes “get healthier” on his list. Each year the list is forgotten by February, and nothing much has changed.

The first read

He sincerely wants to be healthier, so writing it down each year feels like a real commitment to changing.

With this idea

This year he writes: “Walk to work three days a week, because I want energy to play with my kids. First step: find a safe walking route on Sunday. Check in on the first of each month.” By June he is still walking.

What changed

He turned a wish into a goal with a reason, a first step and a check-in.

Easy to get wrong

• Thinking every goal must be rigid or measured in numbers. Some meaningful goals, like being a more patient parent, are hard to measure — they still benefit from a reason and a first step.
• Turning every wish into a goal. Holding some things lightly, as hopes for someday, is fine.

What this rests on

Well studied. Researchers have studied this a good deal. The core idea holds up, though details vary between people and settings.

• Edwin Locke & Gary Latham — goal-setting theory (1990, 2002) — Many studies finding that specific, challenging goals usually lead to more effort and better performance than vague “do your best” goals. The effect is strongest for well-understood tasks; for complex or new work, learning goals can do better than outcome targets.
• Peter Gollwitzer — implementation intentions (1999), with a 2006 review by Gollwitzer & Sheeran — Deciding in advance when, where and how you will act (“if it is 7pm on Thursday, I will…”) makes follow-through considerably more likely.

Try it: Wish into goal

1. Write one wish you have carried for a while.
2. Add why it matters to you, in your own words.
3. Add what having it would look like, and the very first step.
4. Add the date you will check in on it.

Reflect

• Which of your current goals would you still choose if nobody else would ever know about it?
• Which of your “goals” is really still a wish?

Use it in the coming days

Turn one wish into a goal in My Goals this week, with its reason, a first step as a milestone, and a check-in date.

Where to do it: My Goals

My Goals asks why a goal matters and holds its steps — exactly what turns a wish into a goal.